Free Indeed therapy incorporates the work of psychologist John Gottman, who is world-renowned for his work on marital stability and divorce prediction. With over forty years of breakthrough research with thousands of couples, Gottman concludes that couples do not necessarily divorce because they fall out of love, but because they never learn how to resolve their problems.
If you were invited to play in a semi-professional soccer match, yet you did not know the rules of the game, how would you respond? Likely, you would decline, rather than try to participate without an understanding of the game, or having developed the skills to play. However, with regard to marriage, most of us begin without the necessary skills for effective communication and conflict resolution. We typically do not already know how to connect with a spouse on a heart level.
In couple’s counseling, we will begin with an assessment of your marriage successes and struggles. I will listen to the challenges within your marriage relationship with the goal of aiding each person to feel heard and understood. We will work to identify the presenting problem and the unmet heart needs of each person. The first step to healing is acknowledging and owning our pain.
Virginia Satir, a renowned psychologist, coined the phrase “the problem is neverthe problem! It is only a symptom of an unmet need of the heart. What are the needs of our hearts? How do I own my needs and communicate them to my spouse in a non-defensive manner? Learning the universal needs of every heart equips one to understand why they are feeling frustrated and unfulfilled.
We will work together to master the skills of speaking your truth in love, regulating your ownemotions and practicing the art of conflict resolution and connection. I will work with you individually and as a couple. We will role play learned skills in my office with me as a facilitator and coach.
Lastly, I will help you to establish couple rituals and traditions that will foster connection and “the good stuff” that we long to experience. An intimate and satisfying marriage relationship is one of greatest blessings we can experience this side of heaven. A healthy relationship blesses your children and has tremendous power and influence in our communities. Every penny and ounce of energy expended towards achieving a God -honoring relationship with yourself and your spouse is worth its weight in gold